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IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!!! I  am so excited! 
I got a BRAND NEW CAMERA!!! It is absolutely AMAZING....


AMAZING!
I love it!! and I have to go get a memory card for it today! 


Lately (as in yesterday and this morning) I have been thinking a lot about the value of friends.   Two of my best friends are leaving for college this fall...and I'm not sure when exactly it will hit me (Hayden and Brooke). As I have been contemplating my friends and who I will hang out with next year I became a little concerned because I felt like I don't really know who my real friends are.  Sure I hang out with tons of people and we have casual conversations, but I want to figure out who I should pursue a lasting and true friendship with.  I also feel like Shannon and I have drifted far from eachother, even though we say we are still close...I feel like she has changed so much and we have not been able to spend much of any time together.. I don't know why.  It's hard to admit that maybe we have outgrown eachother and might possibly be headed down different paths (don't get me wrong, I don't think she has jumped off the deep end, but I also don't think she is making the BEST decisions, just from what I've seen from the people she associates with) She doesn't tell me  anything personal .  Which is weird considering the deep level 3 conversations we used to have. How did we go from level 3 to level 2? I would really like to know. 


Here are some of my realizations: 
Friends are not to be used to gain social status, or to make others feel inferior, or to bombard everyone on facebook with your life in pictures and the "fun" you just had.  Friends are fragile and should be cherished. Rather than counting the quantity of friends I have, I have made it a new goal to determine the quality. As terrible as it sounds I feel like often times I have used people to be noticed in some way shape or form.  I want to start living in a nonjudgmental world.. at least in my mind.  Where I will hang out with who I please and we will have fun in the moment, without worrying about what pictures we have to take only to load them up to facebook, twitter, or instagram.  I mean really? What is the point of that. I don't want others to see my personal life! hahaha  **What I want to start doing is still take pictures, but then print a couple out to give to my friends! I think this would build relationships more than an upload by actually giving them a tangible gift that they can hang up/ do whatever they want with it and see. (Plus it adds the gift aspect, which shows effort and has a more intimate feeling) I Love this idea! now to get the photo paper and ink! or maybe CVS will just become my best friend.**
Sometimes I feel like I chicken out of building friendships with girls...actually I don't know that that is true, I think I am probably just a lot more picky with my girl friends because I am extremely aware of "drama mamas".  I try to stay far away from those that seem to constantly be caught up in some kind of argument. However a couple of people do come to my mind that are good wholesome girls and a lot of fun, who don't get caught up in drama at all.  {Jenna, Kim, Fran}
I need a good solid group of girlfriends.  Something I feel like I haven't had since Shannon and I have become some distant. I need to start pursuing these relationships and become close with these girls.  All of them have some kind of quality that I wish to have and can help me become a better person.  They would all be a positive influence on me, plus they are all a TON of fun! So that's my new goal! Become extremely good friends with Jenna, Kim, and Franny!!!  Time to get started! :) 


Question's to ponder:


-How good is the relationship I have with each of my friends? 
-Do I make an effort to care for this person? 
-Do I like spending time with this person or would it be better if I let them go? 
-Am I able to be myself around so and so? Are they able to be themselves around me?
-What can I do to be a friend towards others?
-What  can I do to give in each relationship I have?
-Do I spend more time taking or giving?
-Who are my TRUE friends? and am I spending time with them?
-Sometimes true friends are the people you least expect